Except for the mention about the knitting this is not a very happy post. It isn't about cooking or shows. I feel very introspective and angry.
I was getting my morning bagel and I was thinking how I enjoy eating bagels in a certain way. I like them a little crusty on the outside (but not stale or hard) and soft on the inside. I do not like them toasted. I then thought that I was being picky. I’m not the type of person who can afford luxury in my life such as replacing something because there is something newer and maybe better out there. So why am I so picky about a bagel. Usually we buy something new if the old item broke such as a clock, watch, fridge, and TV and so on. We purchase things on sale or that are store brand. I’ve even had the same work shoes with the scuffs on them for a while now. Even my good work shoes have a hole on the front(that is only noticeable to me and I have had both for years). I still wear the watch Niel gave me a few years ago with the clasp that dangles. These last two lines could also say that just I am too lazy to get new shoes and get the clasp repaired. I wouldn’t consider us to be poor. We are luckier that most of the world. We are able to live in a roomy apt, do not go hungry, occasionally go out on the town, can take a vacation(abet after two years) but still a vacation, have health insurance and a 401k plan. Even if I won a lot of money I hope to still be a bit frugal. I would pay off bills, get a new car or two(one for each), a house, and pay off our parent’s mortgages, and send them on a trip as well as us. I just thought it was funny how my mind went on a tangent as I was eating a bagel. I guess the few things I can be luxurious about is a bagel. This doesn’t mean I don’t drool when I see something new. For a while I had this fantasy that I wanted to change all of my kitchen items to stainless steel. Such as the liquid soap pump, the spice rack, the utensil holder. But for what? Maybe it is the way I grew up. We grew up poor compared to how Niel and I live now. Every penny was counted so maybe this is why I feel guilty for anything new I purchase.
I came across this article. Can you believe someone would not be hired, because they are over qualified?
I am really distressed by how the race is going. Kerry is winning. I don’t think just having any old Democratic in the White House is a good thing. It could be even worse than it is now. Dean is the only one that has been honest and has done good things for his state. I haven’t seen that with Kerry. So why is Dean doing so poorly? Doesn’t this country want change?
I am still practicing knitting. It is a lot of fun. I don’t feel confident enough to make anything just yet. Although when I will be comfortable I know I want to make a scarf.
I finished reading The Burning Tigris. I was very glad to have had the opportunity to have read it. Although it distressed me greatly I needed to read it. The book provided in great detail what led to the Armenian Genocide. The bottom line is there is no reason for what the Turks (or as I like to think of them as the scum of the planet) did to over a million and a half Armenians between the late 1800’s to the mid 1900’s. And it was not just the Turkish government to blame. The Turkish citizens went to bazaars to purchase the items of murdered Armenians. If you have a weak stomach please do not read the rest. Some of the way my people were tortured and killed was by rape, starvation, cutting off the flesh off the bottoms of their feet and pouring acid on them, pulling back finger nails, stabbing, strangulation, hangings, death marches, bayonets, throwing children on top of swords, drownings, being pushed off of cliffs, beatings they were hung on crosses, slavery(sex included) burnings and through forced conversion. Sometimes as they were being killed the Turks would shout at them “Where is your Christ now?” The Turks hated having “foreigners” or as they called the Armenians, infidels, in their country whom were doing better off then them. Instead of working a bit harder they decided to kill all the Armenian politicians, artist, teachers, scientists, doctors (basically anyone that did any good for Turkey) and then go on to kill the ordinary Armenian workers as well. They did not care if they were old, women, children or babies. Yet those bastards deny it to this day. So my grandmother (may she rest in peace) and all the survivors of the genocide were lying? My grandmother lost her sister who was raped and murdered. They took away my great grandfather’s property, which included a mansion and fruit farms. What did the Armenians decided to get together and pick on those poor Turks who have obviously provided so much good for the world? I hope if there is a hell that the Turks suffer and whoever else currently has any Armenian goods suffer also. And the world did nothing and we as a society continue to do nothing unless there is something to gain for ourselves. For shame. For shame.
The next book I hope to begin reading eventually is a book Niel recommened about history. I forget the name.